Top Ten Forms of Halal Entertainment

<Your own forms of Halal Entertainment might be slight different but this is a brother’s own . I suggest you make a list of yours and make sure you keep them in mind to have balanced/de-stress life!>

Many Muslims have a misconception that having fun is Haraam. Nothing could be further from the truth as having fun is part of human nature and Islam is the religion of Al-Fitrah (Human Nature). Unfortunately, despite the fact that most forms of entertainment are Halal, many Muslims seem to indulge in the Haraam forms instead.

So here are my top ten favorite Halal things to do for fun. But remember even Halal forms of entertainment become Haraam through overindulgence and neglecting your Islamic duties:

 

10. Eating out:

Everybody enjoys going out to their favorite fast food joint and enjoying a delicious chicken tikka or burger. This is completely Halal and extremely fun, especially when you go with company, so go ahead and enjoy yourself… just make sure the chicken is Halal!

9. Reading:

Not everybody enjoys this but I do, there is nothing like a good book to take your mind of things and help you relax. Of course one must choose a book whose content in Halal and it is preferable to read books by Muslims, unless you have reached the level of knowledge to read Non-Muslim books, and separate the good from the evil.

Don’t forget that the first command in the Quran was to “READ” so enjoy your reading, and may Allah help us all reach
the level where we enjoy reading Islamic books.

8. Swimming:

This one is recommended by the prophet (peace be upon him), and there is no better way to cool off on a hot day! So make sure your Satr is covered and enjoy the water in the upcoming summer.

7. Relaxing:

We all need a break and nobody can pray all day, the prophet (peace be upon him) recommended that we will our lives in balance and said, “An hour for your Lord and an hour for yourself,” meaning that we should split our day and balance between Islamic work and living life. So do not stress, when you get tired, sit back and relax. Its perfectly Halal, just don’t sleep through any salah times.

6. Video Games and Videos:

Not all video games and videos are Haraam; it’s the content that matters. So if you enjoy playing video games and can balance without getting addicted, make sure you only buy Halal games (that means no Grand Theft Auto!). The same with movies and other videos, watch something Islamic or something beneficial and keep away from movies which have shameless scenes and teach bad things.

Most importantly, do not get addicted and sit till Fajr time praying Pro Evolution Soccer, because that would then become haraam. So balance and be careful and responsible when choosing the content, and do not try to fool yourself that a certain movie is halal when you know it is not, because you can not fool Allah or the angels sitting with you watching and writing down every moment into your book of deeds.

5. Nature:

I love nature! Whether it is the ocean, forests, animals, I just love being out in the natural environment. It is one of those times when I feel closest to Allah and feel peace inside me. There is no feeling equal to praying under a tree or on a mountain. Take my word for it and book your next family holiday at some place natural, like the Drakensburg Mountains of South Africa. It is Beautiful!

4. Nasheeds:

I love Nasheeds, in them I have found the perfect replacement for music and a source of both joy and education for myself. It is narrated that Umar (RA) said, “Singing is the companion of the traveler”. I do not know how authentic that narration is, but Imam Malik did say there is nothing wrong with singing while traveling – so load your cars with Zain Bhikha and Dawud Wharnsby CDs, and throw out the Haraam music, and enjoy Halal beneficial entertainment as you drive to work and back!

3. Hanging out with the right crowd:

Your friends either make you or break you. The prophet (peace be upon him) said, “Every person follows the religion of his best friend so be careful whom you befriend”.

Since we are all social beings, hanging out and socializing will be high on our list of ways of having fun, yet it is so important to have the right friends. Your friends are the ones who encourage
you to pray or to skip the prayer and catch a movie. They are the ones who tell you your Hijab looks beautiful or that it makes you look old. In the end, whom you choose to hang out with, makes the biggest difference in who you become.

Sadly, in South Africa we have an added problem in that having fun is looked upon as Haraam as a result many practicing Muslims in this country are B-O-R-I-N-G! So it is even harder to find good friends here who are practicing yet cool and fun, but they do exist. You just have to look in the right places, like at the Al-Kauthar courses and ILM-SA programmes. Hang out with those crowds, you will become a better Muslim and have an awesome time at the time!

2. Playing with kids:

I have two baby boys, two baby nieces, a baby brother, a baby cousin and many other little people in the family and there is nothing that is more fun to me than spending time with these innocent sweet kids and playing with them. Children are a joy and the coolness of my eyes. On this point, I hate people who hate kids and treat them badly, it’s because of such people in our Masjids that many kids grow up traumatized and hate the Masjid and Islam. That is not Islamic at all.

The prophet (peace be upon him) would play with kids even in the Masjid, sometimes when he was in Sajdah, he would be very long because his grandchildren were riding on his back. That’s the Sunnah not banning the kids from the Masjid and growling at them whenever you see them! Playing with children is part of the Sunnah methods of having fun.

One last hadith on this topic, once the prophet (Peace be upon him) kissed his grandchildren in public, a man commented that he had ten kids and never kissed any of them. The prophet (peace be upon him) replied, “What can I do if Allah has removed mercy from your heart, who ever does not show mercy will not be shown mercy,” Think about that next time you mistreat a child.

1. Marriage and all the fun it legalizes:

Being with the opposite gender is the natural desire of every human and it is such a situation that one has the most fun, especially if there is love between them. Islam does not prohibit this but promotes it in the form of marriage while prohibiting it outside of marriage. So dump your boyfriends and girlfriends, get religious and marry a cool religious person!

The prophet (peace be upon him) stressed the importance of marriage many times and also stressed the importance of having a fun marriage. If your marital life sucks, your life in general will be miserable, but if you are happily married and enjoying it (like I am, masha’Allah) then you can cope with every other problem you face. The prophet (peace be upon him) has a fun marital life, he would race with his wives, have food fights with them, joke with them. Study his life with them; he was the perfect husband so let us all follow in his footsteps.

Once the prophet (peace be upon him) advised a young companion who had married an elderly woman, “you should have married someone young (like you) so that you could play with her and she could play with you”. So what are you waiting for?

If you are married, make changes to improve your marital life and make it a source of fun and pleasure for yourself, and if you are not married, get married soon and have a lot of kids so that then do everything else of this list with your wife and kids, its more fun like that than when you are alone.

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I hope you all enjoyed and benefited from this list and I hope that it will assist you in living Halal, practicing Islam and enjoying it. May Allah guide us all to the straight and balanced path and put the love of Islam into our hearts.

A guest post by brother Abu Muawiyah Ismail Kamdar – a young student of knowledge under Dr Bilal Philips. http://muslimmatters.org/2009/12/08/top-ten-forms-of-halal-entertainment/

Helping a muslim…

To help a Muslim in some important work and to do it for his sake or to remove his troubles and worries is an act which has been promised much reward by the Prophet. Abdullah bin Omar said that our Holy Prophet said, “’One who helps someone in his need, Allah helps him in his work, and one who removes any worry or trouble of any Muslim, Allah, in return, removes anyone of his worries on the Day of Judgment’. (Abu Daud, Kilab-al-Adab, Bad-al-Muvakhat)

Telling someone the way, sharing someone’s load or helping him with it, and all other acts of public service are included in the acts defined by this hadith.  “Those who help others are truly much blessed,” as the hadith says, “Best people are those who are useful to others.”

Hence all occasions of service, big or small, must be sought for; this increases one’s merits. If someone is a victim of tyranny, it is the duty of every Muslim to save him from it.

A hadith tells us that the Holy Prophet said “A Muslim is the brother of another Muslim”, and “A brother does not leave his brother helpless nor does he lie to him nor yet makes false promises, nor treats him with cruelty.” (Tirmidhi: AI Birr wa-al- Silah)

Another hadith runs as follows, “If a Muslim is being insulted and degraded and his honour besmirched somewhere and another Muslim leaves him helpless, Allah would leave the latter helpless on occasions when he would need help. And if any Muslim helps him in when he is insulted and degraded, Allah shall help him when he would need help” (Abu Da’ud: Adab)

Helping a Muslim includes appropriate refutal of any wrong charges or insinuations levelled against another Muslim. Abu Darda’ report that our Holy Prophet has said, “One who defends the honour of his brother, Allah keeps the fire of hell away from his face on the Day of Judgment.” (Tirmidhi: al Birr wa al Silah, Chapter 20)

SOURCE:Extracts from “Easy Good Deeds” by Mufti Justice Mohammad Taqi Usmani, Translated by Jamil Naqvi

Muslim Standard Time – How to Cure the Chronic Disease

< I so love productivity and getting real result ;  as a Muslim we have to think on our feet when it comes to time management. so yeah i love productivemuslim.com where i found this piece JZK to Author (Br. Taha Ghayyur) too>

“Oh my God. I am running late, again! Well, it’s all good. No one is going to be there on time anyway.”

How many times have you heard this and similar phrases in the Muslim community? Perhaps you are guilty of uttering them yourself as a habit.

Sadly, starting off late, arriving late, and delaying our programs has become a norm for many of us.

It’s gotten so bad that we no longer even feel guilty about arriving late to a class, function, meeting, Jumah prayer or appointment. Many don’t even bother to apologize. We fail to realize how much time and resources of others we waste due to our own insensitivity and indifference.

I remember arriving at a wedding last summer about two hours late (due to a pre-planned legitimate reason), only to find over half the wedding hall full of non-Muslim guests still waiting for the bride and groom and their families to arrive. The most heartrending scene was of a group of non-Muslim friends laying on the ground asleep. It turned out they were out-of-town guests who had arrived a couple of hours prior to the “official’ start time.

Of course the blame goes both to the organizers of the events and the attendees. It’s easy to criticize the organizers, but we have to do our part of making the program or meeting professional. It begins with arriving on time and respecting everyone else’s time.

As Muslims, every time we arrive late we lose respect in the sight of others. Imam al-Ghazali, in his commentary to a Hadith describing the characteristics of hypocrites, states that the trait “when he makes a promise, he never fufills it” includes specially those who consistently say ‘In-sha-Allah’ and arrive late.

I know of a great contemporary Muslim scholar who, when he used to enter a conference, meeting, or dinner, the audience or members would match and reset their watches to the minute he was supposed to arrive at because he was reputed to be strict with time-management.

What can you and your family do and how can you prepare to arrive on time at any event:

1. Get the directions to where you are going in advance. The common excuse for arriving late we often present is “got lost” or “I didn’t have correct directions.”
2. Arrange your ride at least two days in advance. Call around and find out who can give you a ride. Always have a backup plan for rides. “I didn’t get a ride” is one excuse given, to which I ask: did you ask around early enough? Don’t wait for others to offer you a ride.
3. Start getting ready at least 30-45 min. before leaving home. Don’t run into the shower, squeeze in three Rak’at of Maghrib, or iron your clothes just three minutes before you are supposed to step out!
4. Have a realistic estimate of travel time. If you know it takes 25 minutes to get to a place, you have to leave your home at least 35 minutes before arrival time.
5. Consider weather and traffic conditions. Listen to the local news or watch the weather report before getting behind the wheel.
6. The 10-minute Rule works! No matter what the occasion, always aim to get to the destination 10 minutes ahead of time. This allows you to accommodate any last-minute uncertainties: “Oh, I forgot my wallet at home,” “Man, I have to pick Brother x on the way,” “Oops! I have to pray my ‘Asr before I get to…” Etc.
7. If it helps you, set your personal watch, cellphone or car time five minutes ahead.
8. “Well it’s a typical Muslim party or conference! There is no way they will start on time!” Well, guess what, if we ALL adopt this attitude, no one would ever arrive on time and let the program start on time. We have to change this thinking and make a point to arrive on time. Being people of principle, we must remain consistent in all circumstances.
9. Be honest! Be honest to yourself and others. If you know you are going to be late to a party or Halaqa, clearly set that expectation with your host, coordinator or meeting leader. What does it take to drop a message or call to let the other person know that you will be 10 to 15 minutes late (whether it’s due to expected or unexpected reasons).
10. Don’t succumb to the “In-sha-Allah Syndrome.” Use In-sha-Allah only when you know you mean it.

SOURCE: This post was prepared and submitted by Br. Taha Ghayyur to- http://www.productivemuslim.com/muslim-standard-time-how-to-cure-the-chronic-disease/

Sadaqah – Giving in Charity

Giving is a key character of a muslim… and this article has been posted to do justice to it essence. We hope it encourage you to enjoin in charity works & deeds!

SADAQAH (giving in charity) is a deed designed to eliminate the spiritual malady of miserliness. But because the heart of the giver is not immune from show and insincerity, it has been emphasized that Sadaqah should always be given secretly. Certainly, Riyaa (show) and miserliness art both very destructive diseases and Sadaqah that is rendered secretly is a powerful remedy to them.

In the grave, Riyaa assumes the form of a snake and miserliness takes the appearance of a scorpion and both are set on the sinner to inflict torture and pain. Thus, one who desists from spending in the Path of Allah out of miserliness has, in reality, incurred the punishment of scorpions and one who spends, but with insincerity, has, in fact opted for the punishment of snakes.

SADAQAH SHOULD NOT BE CONSIDERED A FAVOUR

If is quite common to feel that one is rendering a favour on which one confers a Sadaqah. This is an absolutely erroneous concept and should be dispelled. At times it is difficult to ascertain the presence of such malady in one’s heart. This can be achieved by carefully observing the condition of the heart after having given Sadaqah. For instance, if you expected an expression of gratitude in return of your Sadaqah, or subsequent to your Sadaqah, the recipient showed disrespect to you or maltreated you and this infuriated you, then this evidently explains that the Sadaqah had been by you as a favour.

A CURE FOR THE ABOVE MALADY

A simple technique to eradicate such disease is to regard the needy as your benefactor, for he has become the cause of absolving you from your obligation and replacing the evil disease of miserliness with generosity.

Because Zakah and Sadaqah have been imposed to root out the undesirable malady of miserliness, the Holy Prophet (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam), considering the object of its imposition would never bring the money of such funds into personal use. He would explain that this is the dirt of (people’s) wealth. Hence the Muslim who has become instrumental in washing away the dirt accumulated in your wealth has rendered you a favour and not vice versa.

What will your conception be of a surgeon who wishes to operate free of charge? People pay large amounts of money to get their physical ailments removed. Why then are we not grateful to those who remove our spiritual diseases without even charging us a single penny. Moreover, the physical ailments are of a transient nature and will at the most, result in death, whereas the spiritual ones have far reaching effects that will accompany the person in the Afterlife too.

Because Zakah and Sadaqah play a chief role in fulfilling the needs of the poor and eliminating starvation from the world, this is also regarded as a pillar of Islam.

To facilitate the giving of Zakah and Sadaqah. Allah has firstly ordered the creation to love Him and then made the act of giving in charity a yardstick to measure the extent of love in the hearts of those who claim to do so. To demonstrate this love, believers are commanded to spend in the Path of Allah and thereby distinguish themselves from the false claimants of love.

If a human can sacrifice his entire possession for the petty love of another then sacrificing a small proportion of wealth for the Creator should not be felt as a burden. In fact, a Muslim should be prepared to give away all his possessions.

THOSE WHO DO SPEND IN THE PATH OF ALLAH CAN BE DIVIDED INTO THREE CATEGORIES

The ones who belong to The highest are those who give away, whole heartedly everything they possess thus proving true their claim of love. Abu Bakr Siddeeq (ra) held this rank, which, on one occasion had brought every content of his house before the Messenger of Allah[SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam. And when asked, ‘”What have you left for yourself?” replied, “Allah and His Messenger (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam) ” On this occasion Umar (ra) had also brought his belongings and in reply to the same question said, “I have left as much as I brought.” Upon hearing the answers of both, the Prophet (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam) said (addressing the two), “Your ranks are evident from your replies.”

The second category consists of those who, although fail to give away their entire possession, neither spend unnecessarily on other avenues such as personal pursuits. Their spending is not unrestricted and liberal at all times like the first group; rather, they will wait for situations and needs to arise and when they do their generosity will know no bounds. They will spend as much as they are capable of spending. Much of the money they have accumulated stays with them awaiting opportunities for them to spend in the Cause of Allah.

The lowest category comprises those Muslims who suffice on paying their annual due. They will neither decrease in that nor increase. The ranks of the above mentioned categories and the degree of their love for Allah can easily be assessed by their conditions, i.e. how much and how frequently they spend.

You should endeavour to reach the highest of these categories. If not possible, you should at least avoid being classed amongst the lowest. To achieve this, apart from the obligatory acts, you will need to spend a little everyday. This will allow you to reach the lower stages of the second category, rising above the category of the miserly ones.

Muslims who are poor and unable to spend should not be disheartened by their inability, as the achievements of the rewards of Sadaqah are not only confined to giving in charity and helping the poor. They can be attained by other deeds as well. Any good deed, no matter how small, will earn them an equivalent reward. Some of these are mentioned below:

–To visit the sick.
–To attend a funeral.
–To assist someone in times of need, such as helping a labourer carry some
of his weight or interceding on someone’s behalf.
–To say a good word, such as consoling the grief stricken, or encouraging
a despairing one.

These are all known as acts of Sadaqah and one does not have to be wealthy to accomplish them.

THE WISDOM BEHIND SPENDING SECRETLY

As mentioned before, it is important that when you spend, you should do so quietly and not publicly. A Hadith in this regard states. “To spend secretly in the Path of Allah extinguishes the Anger of Allah.” On another occasion, it has been mentioned, “One who spends with the right hand such that it even goes unnoticed by the left (i.e. he exercises extreme sincerity) shall be resurrected among the seven categories of people who will be under the shade of the Throne of Allah on a day when there shall be no shade except that one.”

But that should not mean that you wait for the heart to reach that stage in order to spend, for this is clearly a deception from Shaytaan. You should continue to spend, regardless of the conditions of your heart and eventually you will reach your goal and be able to give wholeheartedly. Until then, Allah will reward you abundantly for overcoming your desires of withholding the money.

Secondly, spend the best of your possessions in the Path of Allah. Would it not be inappropriate to give something to Allah which you yourself dislike? As explained earlier, such spending has been designed to gauge one’s love for the Creator. Hence your selection of wealth will determine the intensity of your love for Him. Thirdly, you should spend wholeheartedly. With respect to this a Hadith states, “(The reward of spending) one Dirham can exceed (the reward of) one hundred thousand Dirhams;” i.e. the reward of one who spends wholeheartedly and unrestrictedly will be multiplied manifold in contrast to one who does not do so.

Fourthly, the avenues of spending should also be thoughtfully and carefully chosen. In giving Sadaqah, preference should be given to one who has noble spiritual qualities over one who does not. If all the good qualities are not found in a single person then even the possessor of a single quality will be deserving of your Sadaqah. However, piety and Deeni knowledge should be given preference above all else. For only a pious and an ‘Aalim (Islamic scholar) will fulfil the prime objective of the provisions gifted by Allah.

They are the ones who live on this earth solely to make preparations for the Hereafter and consider this mortal world to be only a rest house wherefrom the souls will very soon depart. Hence such persons can surely be expected to utilize your Sadaqah in the correct avenues.

The Holy Prophet (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam) has said, “Feed the pious people.”

Quranic Text Regarding Sadaqah

“The believers … are steadfast in prayers, and in whose wealth there is a right acknowledged, for the poor and the destitute”. (Qur’an 70:22-24).

“That which you give in usury for increase through the property of (other) people, will have no increase with Allah: but that which you give for charity, seeking the Countenance of Allah, (will increase); it is those who will get a recompense multiplied.” (Qur’an, 30:39)

“Only those who believe in Our Signs, who when they are recited to them fall down in adoration, and celebrate the praises of their Rabb (only God and Sustainer), nor are they (ever) puffed up with pride. They forsake their beds of sleep, the while they call on their Rabb (only God and Sustainer), in Fear and Hope. And they spend (in charity) out of the sustenance which We have bestowed on them. Now no person knows what delights of the eye are kept hidden (in reserve) for them — as a reward for their (good) Deeds. Is then the man who believes no better than the man who is rebellious and wicked? Not equal are they. For those who believe and do righteous deeds are Gardens as hospitable Homes, for their (good) deeds.” (Qur’an, 32:15-19)

“The likeness of those who spend for Allah’s sake is as the likeness of a grain of corn, it grows seven ears every single ear has a hundred grains, and Allah multiplies (increases the reward of) for whom He wills, and Allah is sufficient for His creatures’ needs, All-Knower).” (Qur’an, 2:261)

“For Muslim men and women, for believing men and women for devout men and women for true men and women, for men and women who are patient and constant, for men and women who humble themselves, for men and women who give in charity, for men and women who fast, for men and women who guard their chastity, and for men and women who engage much in Allah’s remembrance for them has Allah prepared forgiveness and great reward.” (Qur’an, 33:35)

“Those who (in charity) spend of their goods by night and by day, in secret and in public have their reward with their Rabb (only God and Sustainer). On them shall be no fear nor shall they grieve.” (Qur’an, 2:274)

Hadith Regarding Sadaqah

The Holy Prophet (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam) has said: ‘Your smile for your brother is Sadaqah. Your removal of stones, thorns or bones from the paths of people is Sadaqah. Your guidance of a person who is lost is Sadaqah.’ (Bukhari)

Abu Hurairah (RA) reported Allah’s Messenger (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam) as saying: “Charity does not in any way decrease the wealth and the servant who forgives, Allah adds to his respect; and the one who shows humility, Allah elevates him in the estimation (of the people).” (Muslim)

Abu Hurairah (RA) narrated that the Prophet (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam) said, “The example of a miser and the one who gives in charity, is like the example of two men wearing iron cloaks so tightly that their arms are raised forcibly towards their collar-bones. So, whenever a charitable person wants to give in charity, his cloak spreads over his body so much so that it wipes out his traces. But whenever the miser wants to give in charity, the rings (of the iron cloak) come closer to each other and press over his body and his hands get connected to his collar-bones. Abu Huraira heard the Prophet (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam) saying, “The miser then tries to widen it but in vain.” (Bukhari)

Qais ibn Abu Hazim narrated that…. Allah’s Messenger (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam) said, “A Muslim is rewarded (in the Hereafter) for whatever he spends except for something that he spends on building.” (Bukhari)

Mu’aadh bin Jabal (RA) related from the Prophet (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam) “Sadaqah extinguishes sin as water extinguishes fire.” (Ahmad, Tirmidhi)

Abu Hurairah (RA) narrated that the Prophet (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam) said, “Every day two angels come down from Heaven and one of them says, ‘O Allah! Compensate every person who spends in Your cause’, and the other (angel) says, ‘O Allah! Destroy every miser.’” (Bukhari)

The Holy Prophet (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam) has said: ‘A Muslim does not plant, or sow anything from which a person, animal or anything eats but it is considered as Sadaqah from him.’ (Bukhari)

The Prophet (Peace be upon him) has said:: “To smile in the company of your brother is charity. To command to do good deeds and to prevent others from doing evil is charity. To guide a person in a place where he can not get astray is charity. To remove troublesome things like thorns and bones from the road is charity. To pour water from your jug into the jug of your brother is charity. To guide a person with defective vision is charity for you.” (Bukhari)

The Prophet (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam) also said: “The believer’s shade on the Day of Resurrection will be his Sadaqah.” (Ahmad)

Abu Dharr (RA) narrated that… Allah’s Messenger (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam) said, “Those who have much wealth (in this world) will be the least rewarded (in the Hereafter) except those who do like this and like this (i.e., spend their money in charity).” (Bukhari)

Abu Hurairah (RA) narrated that Allah’s Messenger (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam) said: “Verily what a believer continues to receive (in the form of reward) for his action and his virtues after his death is the knowledge which he acquired and then disseminated; the pious son that he left behind him; or a copy of the Qur’an which he left as a legacy; or the mosques that he had built; or the inn that he had built for the wayfarers; or the canal that he caused to flow, or a sadaqah which he gave out of his property in the state when he was healthy and alive. (These are the acts of goodness the reward of which) reaches him even after his death.” (Tirmidhi, Ibn Maja and Bayhaqi)

Abu Musa narrated that the Prophet (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam) said, “Every Muslim has to give in sadaqah (charity).” The people asked, “O Allah’s Messenger (SAW)! If someone has nothing to give, what will he do?” He said, “He should work with his hands and benefit himself and also give in charity (from what he earns).” The people further asked, “If he cannot do even that?” He replied, “Then he should help the needy who appeal for help.” Then the people asked, “If he cannot do that?” He replied, “Then he should perform all that is good and keep away from all that is evil and this will be regarded as charitable deeds.” (Bukhari)

Abu Bakr As-Siddiq (RA) narrated that Allah’s Messenger (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam) said, “A crafty one, a miser, and one who keeps reminding people of what he has given, will not enter Paradise.” (Tirmidhi)

Abu Hurairah narrated that “Abu Dharr said to the Messenger of Allah, ‘The wealthy people have all the rewards; they pray as we pray; they fast as we fast; and they have surplus wealth which they give in charity; but we have no wealth which we may give in charity.’ Allah’s Messenger (SAW) said: ‘Abu Dharr, should I not teach you phrases by which you acquire the rank of those who excel you? No one can acquire your rank except one who acts like you.’ He said, Why not, Allah’s Messenger (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam)? He said: ‘Exalt Allah, say: “Allahu Akbar” (Allah is Most Great) after each prayer thirty-three times; and praise Him say: “AlhamduLillah” (Praise be to Allah) thirty-three times; and glorify Him say: “Subhan Allah” (Glory be to Allah) thirty-three times; and end it by saying, “La ilâha illAllâhu wahdahu la shareeka lahu, lahul mulku wa lahul hamdu yuhyi wa yomeetu wa Huwa ‘ala kulli shai’in Qadeer.” ( There is no god but Allah alone, He has no partner, to Him belongs the Kingdom, to Him praise is due and He has power over everything.) Your sins will be forgiven, even if they are like the foam of the sea.’” (Abu Dawud)

The Prophet (SallAllahu Alayhi Wasallam) has said: “Sadaqah (charity) does not decrease wealth.” (Muslim)

SOURCE: http://www.muftisays.com/blog/MUSLIMAH_119/

Al-Lateef, One of Allah’s Beautiful Names

<Thank God for giving my parent the idea that i should be named latyfa….It is true that your name has a lot to do with you.>

From His beautiful and excellent Names is the Ever-Discreetly Gentle (al-Lateef).

He is the One Who is so Discreet in His Actions that He discerns the hidden and secret, and what the hearts are filled with.

He also perceives what is in the lands, of enclosed grains and seeds. He is Ever-Gentle with His devoted slaves and makes things easy for them and keeps them away from difficulties.

He makes the path to His Pleasure and Generosity easy for them. He protects them from every and means that may lead to His anger.

This is through means that they may perceive as well as means that they do not perceive.

He also decrees matters for them that they dislike in order for them to be granted what they love. He is Gentle with them with respect to their own souls as He guides them to His beautiful ways and His noble creations. He is Gentle with them with respect to matters that are external to them with every goodness and righteousness.

The name Al-Lat.eef is close in its meaning to Al-Khabeer (the Well-Acquainted with all things), Al-Ra`oof (the Clement) and Al-Kareem (the Generous).

SOURCE:http://www.islaam.com/Article.aspx?id=195

Aloe Vera: A Natural Cure …

Allah bless us with wonderful natural cure.. if only we will pause and learn more about those things we over look or run from can do to our body. Here is a piece on Aloevera .. Yuck! you say? if you take your time to understand it benefits, you will be able to see that behind that greenish or bitter plant lies abundant healing, Enjoy!

Aloe vera is an impressive plant with an amazing variety of healing benefits. In a single plant, aloe vera offers a potent, natural cure for many internal and external conditions and its medicinal potential makes it a must-have plant for every home.

The gel found inside the aloe vera plant is made up of water, 20 minerals, 12 vitamins, 18 amino acids and 200 active plant compounds or phytonutrients, which are responsible for the plant’s remarkable healing properties.

The use of aloe vera topically, to relieve sunburn or painful joints, for example is well known. However, this versatile plant has also been shown to:

•             Halt the growth of cancer tumors

•             Lower high cholesterol and high blood pressure

•             Ease inflammation and soothe arthritis pain

•             Protect the body from oxidative stress

•             Cure ulcers, irritable bowel syndrome and other digestive disorders

•             Alkalize the body and nourish it with minerals, vitamins and enzymes

•             Accelerate healing from burns

Aloe Vera Reduces inflammation and Boosts the Immune System

Aloe has been found to ease the inflammation of joints, including reducing arthritis pain, when used both topically and internally. One study found that people who drank aloe vera for two weeks began to experience a significant reduction of inflammation symptoms.

Aloe vera contains acemannan, a natural immune booster. Studies have also shown that when aloe is taken internally it can stimulate and regulate the immune system by stopping inflammation and cutting off the blood supply of tumors.

Aloe vera also amplifies the antioxidant effects of vitamins. It makes Vitamin C, Vitamin E and other antioxidants work better, probably due to its effect on enhancing blood quality and allowing the blood to more effectively transport oxygen and nutrients to the body’s cells.

Aloe Vera Destroys Cancer

Research into the anti-cancer effects of acemannan, a phytonutrient found in aloe vera, found promising results. In one study, dogs and cats undergoing radiation for cancer were given acemannan. Not only did the tumors shrink more in the acemannan-treated group, but post-treatment survival was significantly extended.

Another study demonstrated that acemannan increased cells’ production of nitric oxide (NO), an anti-cancer chemical strongly associated with the shrinking of cancer tumors.

Although this particular research was focused on chickens, the same effect has also been observed in humans.

In other studies, aloe vera showed a marked result in producing remission in skin cancers. Its highly effective antioxidant effect has also been found to help prevent skin damage from x-rays and other forms of radiation.

Aloe Vera Stabilizes blood sugar Levels

Diabetic patients who took aloe vera for 3 months experienced a significant drop in fasting blood sugar levels. They also had lower cholesterol levels and slight improvements in total cholesterol. Numerous clinical studies have been published that demonstrate aloe vera’s anti-diabetic properties.

Aloe Vera Heals burns, Cuts and Scrapes

Aloe vera is nature’s first aid kit. It is antibacterial, antiviral and antifungal, making it extremely effective in wound care. Placed directly on or in the wound, aloe vera gel kills bacteria, prevents infection and actually nourishes the damaged tissues while sealing the wound against infection.

Aloe has been known to heal third-degree burn victims with no scarring and to restore burned skin that would have normally died.

Studies confirmed that wounds treated with aloe heal far faster than other wounds not so treated – both for traumatic as well as surgical wounds.

The juice is also effective for the treatment of minor wounds and insect bites by forming a “natural plaster” over the wound.

Aloe Vera Extends Lifespan

A study on rats showed that aloe vera extended lifespan by 10 percent. The study also found that the rats had a less incidence of blood clots in the heart, less kidney disorders, a slightly lower incidence of fatal leukemia and fewer causes of death compared to the control group. Also, no adverse, toxic effects were found with the ingestion of aloe vera.

Aloe Vera Enhances skin Health

Aloe is one of the most widely-used ingredients in skin care products. This is because it is great for the skin. Aloe soothes the skin, hydrates it, nourishes it and accelerates the regeneration of new skin tissue. It also enhances skin health when used internally, such as when added to juices.

Externally, aloe vera gel can be applied directly to the skin as a softening agent and used for the treatment of:

•             skin irritation

•             burns and scalds

•             sunburn

•             wounds

•             eczema

•             psoriasis

•             acne

•             dermatitis

•             ulcers

This is just a selection of the conditions that aloe vera is known to improve or cure. For more information or for further studies, search on Google Scholar.

How to Use aloe Vera

Aloe vera plants are easy to care for. They need bright light and water every two weeks to grow and stay healthy, so keep your plant on a sunny windowsill.

Aloe vera is most effective when used fresh so use it as soon as it is removed from the plant.

The gel found inside the aloe vera leaf contains its health benefits. To extract this gel, cut off a large leaf from the plant. Either strip away the green leaf from around the gel using a knife, or squeeze the gel out. The plant will heal up around the cut leaf, and will not become infected, due to aloe’s anti-bacterial properties.

Apply this cool, soothing gel directly onto the skin, or use it internally by adding it to fresh juices.

SOURCE:

http://www.healthymuslim.com/articles/fewed-aloe-vera-a-natural-cure-for-cancer-diabetes-inflammation-and-much-more.cfm

The Productivity Triangle

The year is still fresh (whether you count the Georgian or Hijirah calendar) and we like to see you achieve more. Here is a tip piece by ProductiveMuslim. We pray your dreams and aspiration will be Insha Allah!

I would like to introduce you today to 3 powerful elements of productivity. These are the cornerstone of productivity without which one cannot be productive, and here they are:

1. Knowledge
2. Action
3. Consistency

I call this the Productivity Triangle, and if all 3 element meet in a person, he/she becomes truly productive. But if one element is missing that’s when unproductivity kicks in.

So how do these 3 elements work?

Knowledge

وَقُل رَّبِّ زِدْنِي عِلْمًا say, “O my Lord! advance me in knowledge (Taha, Chapter #20, Verse #114)

It all starts with knowledge. Understanding what you need to do, and how to do it. One of the top reasons for people to procrastinate on a project or task is that they do not know how to do it. And they are worried to approach this learning curve out of fear that they may never understand how to do it.

Here’s some good news though: Knowledge can be attained in a number of ways, and I’ve yet to meet someone who has put their mind onto something and failed to gain knowledge in that area. But the key factor here is action, you need to put effort in to gaining knowledge.

Here are top tips to gaining knowledge:

1. Research online/offline:

Al-hamdulillah, the information world is in our finger tips these days and this is a blessing of Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) upon us all. I’ve found myself if I lack knowledge in a field, I would firstly go to the Library and pick as many books on the topic as I can, I’ll read some of them and scan through others, then I’ll research online or listen to further audiobooks/podcast on the topic and within a few weeks/months, that knowledge gap would be filled with the permission of Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala)

2. Ask an expert/Someone who has done it before:

If there’s something new you need to learn, then know that there’s a teacher out there who’s ready to share his/her knowledge with you. And trust me, no matter how “important” this person is, you’d be surprised how they would love to pass their knowledge to you. Approaching them through associates or friends can be a good start, or a direct e-mail and cold calling can sometimes work. The most important thing is to be persistent until you get what you need from them.

3. Make dua:

Knowledge is a blessing of Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) upon you, and it’s enlightening. So if you’re stuck or find yourself not knowing much about a subject and really need to learn about it, ask Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) for help and try some of the above methods to gain what you desire. A word of caution here: Make sure you seek beneficial knowledge, that is knowledge that will be beneficial to you either in this world, or hereafter, or both preferrably!

Action

The value of knowledge without action is zilch! In fact, this brings about the wrath of Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) – may Allah protect us. Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) described those who had the knowledge but did little action as “those who incurred His anger” in the opening chapter of the Quran. So let’s not be one of them.

But here’s an important point: in one hand we need to remember that we must take action upon the knowledge that we learnt in order to be productive, but we have to understand here that Action/Ability or Skill comes from Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) first and foremost, since without his permission you can’t do anything. That’s why again in the opening chapter we say: “You alone we worship and You alone we seek help from”. So we want to worship Him, but we can’t worship Him without His permission, and this is true servitude to Allah.

When you realise that everything you do, you’re doing it with the permission of Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala), you’ll be humble in your approach, will seek perfection in all your actions, and you’ll be sincere in what you do.

Also, action starts with you taking the first step. Again, those of us who procrastinate, here’s a killer-productivity technique: Start working on a project/task for just 10 minutes and watch yourself drift to 30-45 minutes. Give yourself a 5 minute break and then start again for ‘just’ 10 minutes. I always say that our ‘nafs’ and self is like a baby, and we have to treat it that way; a bit of encouragement, a bit of scolding, a bit of prize and it’ll get a long just fine.

Consistency

So, you’ve gained the knowledge, you’ve taken action and after a few days, you flop. You can’t be bothered and you’re not productive anymore. 90% of the productivity complaints is regarding consistency. People normally have no issue in gaining knowledge or taking action, but being consistent that’s when they find it hard.

I’ll admit, this is the hardest stage and there’s no easy answer, but here are some helpful advice:

1. Start small and grow slow

It’s tempting when you’re super excited about a project to jump into it with BIG action and BIG tasks only to find yourself overwhelemed a few days after. Why not start small, build small, and grow slowly over the years? Prophet Muhammad (Peace be upon him) said that the most beloved actions to Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) are those that are consistent even if they are small.

2. Break it down

Some of the reasons why it’s hard to become consistent in your action is because the action is HUGE or takes a number of tasks to achieve. Try breaking it down and see if there’s better ways of doing it: can you eliminate some steps? Can you delegate some parts?. As the Chinese proverb goes: A journey of 1000 miles starts with one step. My only addition to this is: KEEP WALKING!

3. Check your Intentions

Sometimes when you fail to be consistent on a project, it might be a sign that perhaps your intentions are not pure and sincere. For example, if you’ve tried many times to memorize the Quran and failed, check your hearth, check your intention, who are you doing it for. Normally, when our intentions are pure and when our goals are bigger than ourselves, it’s easier to be consistent inshaAllah.

4. Ask Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) for help

I swear upon the One who created me and you, you cannot be consistent in any task, project, endeavour you’re in  except by His permission. So ask Allah for help in all your matters and ask Him to that He makes you consistent. Most importantly, ask Him to be consistent in your Deen and religion, so that you’re constantly worshipping Him to the best of your ability and improving yourself and those around you.

I hope you found this article beneficial. Can you find practical examples of how Knowledge-Action-Consistency made you productive?

SOURCE: http://www.productivemuslim.com/the-productivity-triangle/

Embarrassing! Discomfiting! Discombobulating! Dishonouring! …

What do you think about smoking or smokers? or are you one? read this and enjoy the lovely piece by Mulkah Fola HunterTokun

“Having to queue up at the banking hall on a Friday afternoon around 3.30pm is one of the things I dread doing. I was just left with no choice because I had promised to transfer some funds to my sister through one of the First Bank branches.

 

“I counted about twelve people ahead of me and I was busy wondering how much the cashiers had to count that’s taking ages. My conclusion was that they definitely needed more cashiers. Of course, I wasn’t the only one who was getting agitated as I noticed that a well suited up middle aged man, 2 people ahead of me, just kept stepping out of line. One glance at him, and you would think he was the popular Pa Kasumu.

 

“Moments later, he finally excused himself and headed towards the gents.‘Oh!’ I thought, ‘maybe he’s pressed.’ Few minutes after, I heard a loud beep and some words of cursing, followed by what sounded like chanting. All from the direction of the gents. Could you possibly hazard a guess at who could have been the harbinger of this chaos?

 

“The man who just left, of course!!!

 

“He came out all wet, his chanting now clearer,

 

‘This, this…this is embarrassing! This is discomfiting! This is Discombobulating! This is dishonouring! This is degrading! This is humiliating! This is demeaning! This is mortiftying! This…this is abasing!…’ I wasn’t wrong about the pa Kasumu countenance I had observed in him afterall!

 

“ Everybody in the banking hall burst into reeling laughter! I guess his manner of utterance of this oyinbo repete was on one hand enough to stir up the laughter, but on the other hand, he was a sight to behold! He was completely wet, as in, from head to toe! His jacket was dripping water unto the tiled floor, and so was his trousers!! Infact, u needed to see him!

 

“Guess what really happened as I later learnt? He was trying to be a ‘courteous and civilised’ smoker. Hmn hmnn!!!  So that explains why he left the line. I thought something could be rather wrong too as he was fidgety. He felt the urge to smoke. Fine! He wanted to be ‘civilised’ about it, but unfortunately, the bank does not like the smell of smoke! He he he!! They had a sprinkler system installed in the gents, and his smokey cigarette got it triggered off! Oh my!! What a day for this guy! Am so sure he won’t ever smoke again!” This is a modified narration of a colleague at the office.

“I don’t think so! That incident might not be enough to serve as a deterrent to him. It’s not an easy thing for an addict to quit anything, be it cigarette, drugs, prostitution, homosexualism, or whatever vice even though most times they wish they could stop. I only pity his family because they will suffer more from passive smoking.” I countered.

 

“Passive smoking!” I thought aloud. Memories came in torrents.

 

My service year.

 

I served in the Northern part of the country. Precisely in the capital of Kebbi State. With the Ministry of Lands and Housing, Gwadangaji. I guess we all have an idea of how some of these ministries run…a lot of times, people had little to do, so you see them hanging around the walkways, the stair halls, the sidewalks, the porch…practically everywhere, a sizable number of them doing what? Smoking!! The unfortunate part of it is the fact that one has to pass through these alleys to transit between offices and whether liked or not, one commits the ‘offence’ of passive smoking unwittingly.

 

Again I recall Abba’s dad. Abba was one of Mr. Musa’s children whom he had begged me to teach to speak English. He worked at the Ministry and was also a chain smoker.

 

“Mr Musa, why do you smoke?” I confronted him. He was driving me to his residence to take kids as he did Mondays,Wednesdays and Fridays.

 

“Hmn?” He was apparently caught unawares.

 

“Would you like Abba, and probably Amina, your daughter, to become a smoker like you?” I pressed further.

 

“Definitely not! I will kill them! They know they mustn’t do it. I’m an addict, not because I like it, but because circumstances have pushed me. Mulkah, am sorry, I won’t be able to give you the details.”

 

“What if they pick up your cigarette stubs and try to experiment? Anyway, I really don’t need the details, what I’d candidly advice you is that you quit smoking! I know you know it’s bad enough for you, but I doubt if you know that its worse off for your family as they become passive smokers.”

 

He had just pulled up outside the compound, so I got down. I really wondered about what will become of his children. Of course children easily pick up habits of people closest to them, and knowingly or unknowingly make them role models.

 

Now back in Lagos, get to the parks and see them in droves! The drivers, the conductors…the agberos…well maybe not all of them, but most of them are chimneys, and they affect passersby and passengers one way or the other. Many times, I confront the security man at my residence why he sells cigarettes. He said: “E dey move well well!” What a reason! He doesn’t smoke however, but his fellow mallams do. “So u know say e no good to smoke?” I asked. “ I know now, but them dey always ask for am, na why I dey sell be that.”

 

And don’t even think only the downtrodden smoke in Lagos (stale gist!)Tshhhh! This one is meant for only your eyes o … I had a lecturer…He doesn’t live in ‘Mowe’. But we used to call him chimney! The ceiling of his office was no longer white by the time he was moving to another office…For those who know him…I no dey o!!! 🙂

 

Do we really know the import of passive smoking? Passive smoking is the exposure of someone, involuntarily to another person’s smoke. It is also called secondhand smoking. Second hand smoke is made up of gases and particles that are very harmful, especially to children because they are very sensitive and vulnerable to it.

 

Children who are exposed to second-hand smoke at home can easily develop bronchitis, pneumonia or any form of respiratory infection. They will have less developed lungs that have a reduced ability to function well.

 

Temporary effects of passive smoking on children are shortness of breath, coughing, sore throats, pressure or tightness in their chest, wheezing etc.

 

They are more likely to suffer ear infections, fluid in the ears, chronic middle ear disease or “glue ear”, which could lead to some loss of hearing.

 

They can suffer from possible cardiovascular disorders and various types of cancers in childhood as well as in adulthood.

 

They are more likely to die in infancy .The risk is twice as high If a pregnant mother smokes.

 

They are at a higher risk of developing meningitis.

 

So, daddies, and mummies; aunties, and uncles; brothers and sisters; friends and foes. Do u truly like these for your kids?

 

Ok! Something brings about passive smoking- smoking itself! Do you know that in the United States, from reliable statistics, tobacco smoking is the single greatest cause of preventable death? This cannot be far from the truth worldwide. Smoking is a major risk factor for heart attacks, strokes, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD), emphysema(dilated air sacs), and cancer(particularly lung cancer, cancers of the larynx and mouth, and pancreatic cancer). It also causes peripheral vascular disease and hypertension, all developed due to the exposure time and the level of dosage of tobacco.

 

Interestingly, cigarettes sold in developing nations tend to have higher tar content, and are less likely to be filtered, potentially increasing vulnerability to tobacco-related disease in these regions. So Nigerian smokers, emurasi o!

When tobacco is smoked, nicotine causes physical and psychological dependency. Tobacco use is a significant factor in miscarriages among pregnant smokers, and the incidence of impotence is approximately 85 percent higher in male smokers compared to non-smokers, and is a key factor causing erectile dysfunction (ED).With all these information, wont we still ask that why do people still smoke and hardly think of quitting?

 

For those who have been having a hard time quitting, there’s good news: Always remember that there are only two good reasons to take a puff once you quit. You either decide you would be going back to your old level of consumption until smoking habit cripples and then kills you, or you decide you really want to withdraw and make it last forever and keep away from the next free puff! Sorry, hope you were not expecting a list of how-to’s?

 

Sure in the long run, if you still find it difficult to quit, then you are definitely waiting for when it will be humiliating…embarrassing…discomfiting…discombobulating…dishonouring…degrading…humiliating…demeaning…mortiftying…abasing…All for grammar! Well, methinks that if a smoker doesn’t achieve the feat of quitting. Indeed, his black lungs, teeth, ceiling board and burnt fingers et al, will testify!

 

Let’s live a smoke-free life. Ciao.

Sisters Chillin’3

Sisters Chillin’ 3 – A Social event for muslimahs happening in Lagos ( CLICK BELOW TO  RSVP ON FACEBOOK) http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=158065674235772&num_event_invites=0#!/photo.php?pid=7982965&o=all&op=1&view=all&subj=158065674235772&id=549290766 )

10 Habits of Highly Effective Muslim Husbands

Think of getting married or are you married?! Here are 10 tips you can use to become  all your wife in a husband and a kid love in a father. peace!

 

happy mulism family

Alhamdullilah, I have been married for almost three years now and I feel that Muslim Marriage is one of the most beautiful gifts that Allah has given to Muslims in this world.

 

However, Muslim Marriage doesn’t come easy right away. Actually, many husbands today have been spoiled by family or their environment or even society and media. This has caused us to lose our manliness and personal striving that our forefathers and great men in the history of Islam had.

Now, as a Muslim Husband in this generation, I know how important and necessary it is for every Muslim Husband to work hard at their marriage in order for this Ummah to be strong again. After all, without the Muslim Family foundation, all other foundations cannot be formed.

I’ve put together some habits as a personal reminder to myself first and hopefully it can benefit Muslim Husbands out there who want to create a blissful marriage. Some ideas presented are from what I’ve read and heard and some are from experience. Take what applies to you and act on it.

So, let’s start…

1. Exercising, Staying Fit and Healthy

Sorry, brothers, you know this was coming. It is important that we stay healthy, exercise and keep fit for our wives and children. Many of us let ourselves go after marriage when it should be the other way around. When we are fit, we can do more for our wives and children. We also feel good that we are a strong contributing member of the Ummah.

My wife told me a story of how she was visiting a Muslim country recently and saw many couples where the wife was still dressed up nicely but the husband had totally let himself go.

I’m not asking everyone to be Arnold Schwarzenegger but to exercise so that when your kids are 12 years old, you can still kick a soccer ball with them. Because of my career in the software industry, I have to especially work hard at it as it is so easy for me to slack off (which I already have on a few occasions).

Doing what you enjoy will also help you stay fit. You don’t have to lift weights to stay in shape. As long as whatever you do helps you maintain a healthy, fit, Islamic lifestyle.

Also, it is imperative to eat a healthy diet. It doesn’t make much sense to work-out and stay fit and indulge in sweets and desserts everyday. Having a sweet tooth my whole life, I have now limited my sweet intake to one day of the week and have noticed positive changes like having more energy.

2. Dress well and with Ihsan (Excellence)

This is something I had to work on as I was never a good dresser when growing up. It doesn’t mean you have to wear rich expensive clothes. It means that your clothes are in good condition and you look presentable.

Muslims in history were known to dress excellently and to take care of their bodies. In the middle ages, Muslim Spain had running water and baths while the rest of Europe hardly washed their bodies.

Our beloved Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) used to wear Musk to smell good.

Prophetic Saying:
Muslim narrated that Abu Sai’d Al-Khudri said that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “The best type of perfume is Musk.”

Try to buy quality over price or quantity as this is what dressing with Ihsan (Excellence) is about. At the end of the day, your wife will be happy with you and be thinking “MashaAllah.”

3. Read

It is no surprise that the first word revealed from the Quran to Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) was “Read…” (Surah Alaq 96:1).

I always struggled with reading growing up as I was too preoccupied with TV and video games. Even though I excelled in school, reading was always a chore and I didn’t do a lot of it.

However, as a Muslim Husband, reading is an important skill to have. Not only will it enrich you with more knowledge, it can also help with your communication and conversation skills with your wife and children. You will have much more interesting and important things to say and teach your children too.

Especially in today’s age of changing media and technology, if you are not reading and learning, you will be more susceptible to negative influences around you.

4. Help out around the house – Clean!

Many wives today juggle more daily than ever before. Things like working full-time, cooking, cleaning, and taking care of the kids are all part of her daily regimen. Your wife will be more than happy if you can take some of that load off her.

Washing dishes, vacuuming or other chores around the house should be taken up by you and it should be proactively done. Read: Do them before being asked.

Even the best of creation, Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) helped around the house.

Aisha (Ra), the wife of Muhammad (SAW) said: “Allah’s Messenger (peace be upon him) used to patch his sandals, sew his garment and conduct himself at home as anyone of you does in his house. He was a human being, searching his garment for lice, milking his sheep, and doing his own chores.” (Narrated by al-Tirmidhi).

5. Read Quran

A Muslim Husband is the leader of a Muslim Family. He needs to be setting the example for his wife and children. That is why it is important he reads the Quran.

Children imitate. If they see their father read Quran, then they will want to read Quran too. Doing this can actually make children look forward to the dreaded Sunday Quran school.

Before marriage, I wasn’t very good at Quran and barely had any surahs memorized. I then worked hard at improving my reading by attending Tajweed classes and memorizing more surahs.

Praying together is a large part of a Muslim household and knowing Quran will help you, the Muslim Husband, to lead your wife and family. The Muslim Husband or Father should strive to lead the members of his house in prayer at least once a day if not more.

6. Be Critical and Analytical – Talk about Ideas

When I was growing up, my mom had put up a sign in a hallway of our house saying: “Small people talk about other people, Average people talk about things, Great people talk about ideas.”

It is important that a Muslim Husband matures beyond self-interest and is able to transcend petty talk about people around him and material things. He needs to start talking about ideas.

It comes back to the fact that the Islamic role of a Muslim Husband in the family is to lead. If all he talks about is how he hates his boss at work or about his new pair of shoes, his family is going to suffer.

Before being married, it was easy for me to slip in to friends and enjoy trivial things like movies and sports, however, I knew that I had to rise above these activities and start reading and learning more about ideas and principles about how our world works. I needed to increase my knowledge.

I didn’t want a superficial marriage and I didn’t want to be a superficial husband. So I stepped out of my comfort zone and took action to grow intellectually. I believe that if you want a successful Muslim Marriage that Allah will shower His blessings on, it has to be about more than food and cars.

7. Take your wife out – Plan stuff

Every wife likes to be taken out, no matter how religious she is. You also don’t have to be rich either to do so.

Going to the park or buying her a new hijab or checking out that new halal restaurant are all fun activities you can enjoy with her.

I know that I sometimes slack off in the planning department. But every time I plan an outing with my wife, our marriage and relationship improves.

My wife and I have one day of the week that we go out together to explore a part of the city we haven’t yet been or we re-visit a favorite place. It is the day of the week that we re-connect and talk about our ideas.

Try it out, I guarantee you will not be disappointed.

8. Act Manly and Confident – Make Decisions

Men today behave less like men than our forefathers did. If you think back to the time of the Prophet (peace be upon him), his companions were all manly men, were confident and had presence.

Basically, Muslim Husbands need to take action in their lives and not sit idly by and let life slip away from you. I used to be very laid back and complacent in my first year of marriage but I realize that this quality is not beneficial in a relationship. When I started to act with confidence and to take action in my life, I began seeing positive changes in both my marriage and my personal life.

It is important to note the difference between confidence and aggression/domination. The former deals with taking positive action in how one carries himself while still maintaining the haqq/rights of those around him. The latter does not focus on the haqq.

A confident Muslim Man, although a leader of his home, also knows and applies the concept of Shurah/consultation. It is important to include your wife and children in any major and minor decisions that will effect everyone.

Be a Muslim Man. Take Action. Be Confident. Your wife will be happy and your marriage will prosper, inshAllah.

9. Balance between Career/Work and Religion

A Muslim Husband must have balance. He should work and strive in his career to provide for his family as it is a haqq/right of the wife to be provided for (even if she chooses to work). He also must understand the fundamentals of his deen/religion. He doesn’t have to be a scholar, but he should at least know the basics.

I remember I was at Eid Prayer a long time ago and I saw a father teaching his son how to pray before the prayer itself. As a leader of the home, a Muslim Husband must know enough about Islam so that he can teach his wife and children. He shouldn’t be doing it at Eid prayer. He should have done it at home already.

If you can, go to a class once a week about your deen and read more about it. There are also vast resources online about this beautiful religion of ours.

Also, a Muslim Husband should strive to be excellent in any work/career that he takes on. Remember that balancing both is difficult to do but can be achieved gradually.

10. Cook and help with meals

OK, this is a contentious issue. Even though shariah doesn’t say that a wife must cook for her husband, she usually does. And, I am thankful that she does!

As a Muslim Husband, you should help with cooking dinners and preparing meals. This will alleviate some of the load off your wife and she will be very thankful you assisted.

You can do this by making a schedule and telling her which days you can help. Believe me, this will also really help your marriage and improve your relationship.

Source:

http://muslimworker.com/2009/03/10-habits-of-highly-effective-muslim-husbands/